This is the first in a series of articles about the critical role of experience in shaping attachment patterns and in healing unhealthy or negative patterns once they have formed. The experience of a healing relationship, whether it is between a therapist and client, or parent and child, is the most change-producing factor. Many studies on therapy outcome, for example, reveal that the quality of the therapeutic relationship is the primary factor associated with positive results – more important than any theory or methods used. Positive change requires a relationship in which people experience trust, safety, empathy, support, healthy boundaries, and “limbic resonance” (emotional and mental attunement).
Early Experiences
A significant portion of learning, growth and healing is experiential and starts in the early stages of life. A baby’s experience of safe, nurturing, supportive and loving attachments not only affects emotional and social development, but actually shapes the baby’s developing brain.
The baby’s brain is an “open-loop system,” dependent on the parent’s or caregiver’s support, security and emotional connection for healthy growth and functioning.
Early attachment experiences shape the brain’s structure, chemistry and genetic expression in the following ways:
- They activate neuronal firing, creating synaptic connections between neurons (“what fires together wires together”).
- Biochemicals are triggered and released. Secure attachment between baby and parent triggers the release of Dopamine (pleasure, closeness, motivation), Endorphins (reduces pain, enhances calmness and contentment), Serotonin (stress reduction) and Oxytocin (fosters maternal behavior and bonding).
- Early experiences of secure or insecure attachment are programmed into the implicit memory systems (preverbal and unconscious) of the brain’s limbic system and become mindsets and expectations that guide subsequent behavior. For example, you may fear intimacy and dependency as an adult because of experiencing abandonment and betrayal as a child.
Early experiences are a significant indicator of attachment patterns that an individual often carries with them into adulthood. That, however, doesn’t have to mean that a child who has experienced abandonment, lack of love, trauma or abuse in the early years must struggle with the inability to form loving and secure relationships later on. Change is possible. Through healing experiences and with effective experiential interventions unhealthy and damaging attachment patterns can be transformed.
The following articles will go into further depth about:
- transformative relationship and intervention experiences
- examples of effective experiential interventions used at Evergreen Psychotherapy Center
I thoroughly enjoyed your presentation at the Attach conference last month! I am a BSN RN with a masters in behavioral science and working as a psychiatric nurse in the habilitation of developmentally disabled mentally ill individuals in Washington state. In tour video I could see myself as the comforter therapist because that is exactly what I do with my guys… I build rapport and trust and they attach to me as a mother figure. I am honored that they learn to trust me as I know their histories…. I am able to help them transition out of a violent outburst by nonverbal presence when the allow it and then talking them out (not being too verbal). I “beam and gleam” to them daily and I NEVER reject them. It is fascinating work which can be very tiring but for me…. the observant shy girl in high school, it feeds my soul. It was an honor to meet you in person and buy your book which you signed for me. I was so impressed with the multiple lessons in recovery that was being demonstrated in your video when you were working with the family and using the camera for the parents to witness how she really felt. You do amazing work!! Your developmental stage is hard core integrity. It was an honor to meet you and your in the van as we were going to dinner and I got to give you a pat on the shoulder. Best to you… the very best. Gratitude and Love, Laura Hilton
Laura, Thank you for your kind words. Very nice to meet you as well. Terry Levy
Hi Terry,
my wife and I have used attachment concepts to help her heal from some pretty severe fallout from her early childhood trauma; ptsd issues, dissociation, flashbacks, panic attacks, severe anxiety, and more as we have healed/changed her attachment style and the internal working model from which she based so much of her interaction with me and others as we purposefully interacted to reflect a more healthy, secure relationship.
Take care,
Sam