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Attachment security traits

The following is a list of traits associated with attachment security in adults: –Desires closeness: Seeks and enjoys intimacy without being afraid ofbecoming “too close”; does not fear rejection, have a need to push partner away, or engage in a negative relationship “dance” (e.g., pursuer–distancer dynamic; one wants closeness and the other maintains distance); positive […]

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Dependency is natural

Western culture has a long history of emphasizing self-sufficiency and independence. John Watson and the behaviorists in the 1940s warned parents that children should learn to soothe themselves; otherwise they would become weak and overly dependent (Watson 1928). Parents were advised to maintain an emotional and physical distance with their children, allowing them to cry […]

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The genesis of attachment

Before you were born you were floating warmly, comfortably, and securely in  your mother’s womb. You were snug, safe, and content. You basked in the  biochemical messages that you are loved, wanted, and all is well. Then  suddenly one day you were thrust into a frightening world of bright lights, loud  noises, and unfamiliar smells. […]

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Attachment a predictor of success

Attachment is the deep and enduring biological, emotional, and social connection caregivers and children establish early in life. The attachment  relationship is the core of a child’s world and the foundation on which life is built. Attachment security is the most powerful predictor of life success. The creation of attachment occurs as a combination of […]

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Communication style key to attachment

Communication is the key to secure attachment. Sharing and understanding emotional information enables us to feel deeply connected. Communication begins even before birth. Pregnancy is the dawn of attachment, the time in which parents and unborn baby begin to communicate and attach. A mother’s thoughts, feelings, and stress are communicated via a neurohormonal dialogue, and are preparation for communication after […]

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Calm parenting pays off

To be calm is synonymous with being levelheaded, peaceful, patient, and composed.Remaining calm, however, is difficult to do with challenging children. The usual reactionsof frustrated parents are to impose their wills, retaliate, or withdraw to avoid a fight. The only effective way to positively influence children is to gain their trust, making them willing to […]

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